Adult Communities for the Best Elder Care

Getting older should be an exciting part of life, but sometimes it comes with some physical impediments. In this case, it might be a good idea to think about checking into adult communities to get top-quality elder care. Such elder care services allow family members to go to work and enjoy their personal lives without having to worry that the senior citizen is safe and being cared for. One of the main purposes of these services is to delay or prevent the need to move into a nursing home by offering alternative care opportunities to stay social. Caring for an aging parent can be a real challenge for family members, but with senior retirement options, senior citizens can get the right kind of care and attention that they need.

When a senior member of the family is left at home for the whole day, it can be a burden for the children who are at work. It’s important to be with the senior member at all times, and elder care services can guarantee this. From cooking and cleaning to ensuring that medications are taken at the right time, adult communities give peace of mind to families that are unable to take care of a loved one throughout the whole day. To make sure that seniors are living a safe and happy life even after retirement, it is advisable to look out for a senior retirement facility that offers recreational activities along with the right elder care. Elders sometimes need a lot of help with daily tasks, be it bathing, walking, eating, cooking, washing, or personal care. For family members it might not be possible to take care of all of these things, but the elder care services provided in adult communities should be taken note of.

Before deciding on an elder care service, some questions need to be taken into consideration, like whether the aging person prefers a male or female to help and things that might make the person uncomfortable. With a large number of adult communities, a variety of services are being offered and can be chosen accordingly. The best elder care can also be experienced at senior retirement communities where special staff is assigned to each individual so that their needs and requirements are properly addressed. The staff at these facilities listens to the elderly people to help them with their personal care, meals, and other basic requirements.

For seniors, whether or not they require assistance to live a happy life can be determined by their physical abilities. The senior retirement lifestyle is an option that children can select to offer some of the best elder care services to their aging parents. Elderly people might need help with cooking, bathing, and washing, among other things, and if they move into adult communities, they can rest assured that they will receive the best services.

In Home Care for Senior Help: Making Lives Better for All

As the gray-haired population hit the mid-sixties, in home care is much in demand.  Their children have come to realize that caring for their aging and sick parents can tax them beyond their limits.  This can cause a lot of friction in the home, where ironically aging parents should get the most support and understanding during this stage of their lives.   The option to get senior help for the elderly resolves these issues.

 

Independent Seniors

 

In the case of seniors who wish to live at home instead of spending the rest of their days in retirement or nursing homes, senior help or in home care is available.  They can get help to manage their legal transactions, do their shopping and grocery, drive them to community activities, and clean the house and cook their meals.  In case of a medical emergency, there is always someone around who can take them to the hospital.

 

These are the seniors living in their own homes or living on their own.  In today’s society, it is impossible for their children to be around all the time.  Hence, senior help is getting to be the best solution around.

 

How In House Care Can Make Lives Better

 

But living in their home makes a big difference to the seniors.  They would rather stay at home where they have lived for years and be near their friends.  Some may opt for a senior nursing home if they need nursing care and therapy, but still it is in their homes where their hearts are.    

 

At home, old people need companionship.  This happens at a time when their adult children have families of their own, are working, or out of the country.  Some of the elderly are unmarried and have no children, which makes their lives lonely. 

 

Fortunately, in-house care providers do not only do the mechanical routine of cleaning house and cooking meals, or checking if their charge is all right physically.  They also provide friendship and companionship, badly needed by the seniors who have lost most of their friends or who have families out of town.

 

The caregivers are also there to help the seniors:

·         Make the most of their time keeping them productive

·         Meet people and establish new friendships

·         Keep fit by walking in the park

·         Keep mentally alert by reading to them and explaining the TV sitcoms for the hard of hearing

·         Keep in touch with family and friends

 

Making Lives Better for Family Members

 

Caring for the elderly is not for the faint hearted.  It requires physical strength, tons of patience, money, and some skill.  It also affects one’s health because the task is physically demanding.  Although it may cost to get in home care, the benefits that can be gained from it cannot be converted to its cash value.

 

As a primary care provider for your parents, you do the following chores daily:

·         Prepare their special meals early in the morning

·         Feed them

·         Bathe them

·         Assist them with their toilet

·         Give them their medicines

·         See to it they are comfortable

·         Take them to doctor for medical consultations

·         Shop for their needs

·         Clean the house

 

With in home care, you can go to work without worrying about your parents, have more time for your family, and take business trips out of town. 

 

Aging Baby Boomers Need and Demand One-call Home Care Services

The demographics of America are changing – and fast. There is a growing population of aging baby boomers who are savvy, smart and independent, and they know they have choices for their future lifestyles.

The statistics show that this population is on the rise. In 2003, there were 36 million Americans who were 65 and older; by 2030 it’s projected that this population will grow to 71 million. And an AARP study from 2005 found that 89 percent of people 50 and older want to stay at home as long as possible.

To do this, our aging U.S. citizens will likely need assistance in many areas such as housekeeping, yard upkeep, home maintenance, and, in some cases, relocation to new homes or care facilities.

These people, whether they are in need of physical assistance or are busy traveling during retirement, will need others to help them take care of things at home.

With this trend, a unique business opportunity is now flourishing – a “one call resolves it all” home care services for seniors.

It’s an ideal time for investors to capitalize on this new business trend. That’s exactly what Kim and Paul Abelman did when they decided to start a business.

The Abelmans found their new business in Spectrum Home Services. Spectrum is part of a national growing industry offering personal home care for older adults and busy homeowners.

But Spectrum Home Services is different from traditional home care service companies. They are simply one-call away for people who need a broad spectrum of services including housekeeping, yard care, maintenance, companionship and relocation services. Other companies offer a few of these types of services, but not the number of services available through Spectrum.

The Abelmans are happy to offer this service to area seniors and other busy homeowners through Spectrum Home Services.

Kim Abelman shared that “people who choose home care can find it frustrating making calls for numerous services. Many of our clients were calling a handyman for broken items around the house, a yard service to mow their lawn, a home cleaning service to do their laundry and a nursing service to make sure their medication is taken on time.” One call to the Abelman’s Spectrum Home Services fulfills all these needs and more.

In September 2006 they purchased franchise rights to Spectrum Home Services in New Albany, with the guidance of franchise consultant and expert, Barney Greenbaum.

Greenbaum works with clients in the Ohio market through the national organization, FranNet. Using FranNet’s proprietary process, he matches his clients with the right franchise using safety, risk avoidance, high standards, and affordability as criteria.

“My job is to act as first a facilitator to help find the business that matches their requirements, then I coach them along with helpful resources, such as financing, franchise attorney, and accountant, once they find a good fit. We spend 30 to 60 days on the search with a well thought out action plan. My goal is for the client to find the right tools to make the process less scary, and help them reach those important goals,” Greenbaum explained.

He demonstrated this trend in the home care service industry to the Abelmans. “With 10,000 people now turning 60 every day the baby boomer generation will need more caregiver services than the caregivers can easily provide,” said Greenbaum. “Paul and Kim wanted an affordable business they could grow, while maintaining a balance with their family, work, spirit, and health. Working with active seniors on home care projects allowed them this flexibility.”

The Spectrum Home Services approach to home care drew the Abelmans to this business. They discovered that Spectrum was for them after reviewing several other business options.

“We knew that the eventual goal for this business is to provide services that are very much needed,” Kim Abelman said. “We ‘got’ the concept after meeting with Greenbaum and going through the FranNet process.”

The Abelman’s also wanted something that would give back to the community. “We work closely with families and do everything they need done – trash, cleaning, clearing out for Goodwill, running errands,” Abelman explains. “We’ve become like family for many of our clients.”

Abelman says she “liked the networking and marketing aspect of Spectrum. To reach people that need the services, I do in-service programs with discharge managers in hospitals and at realtor meetings. As a former college lecturer, it’s easy for me to put [our business] into words. I’m okay going out and meeting people to teach about this new concept of senior home care.”

With no other franchise like Spectrum in the area, the Ablemans are getting a lot of calls for the services they offer. They’ve also experienced a rise in the number of younger, busy homeowners who call. Some companies are even offering Spectrum Home Services as part of employee benefits to help working families.

Greenbaum enjoyed matching the Ableman’s with Spectrum Home Services and summed it all up: “At the end of the day they added some value to someone’s life, and occasionally they might even get a hug for it.”

To learn more about FranNet in the Columbus area, contact Barney Greenbaum at

614-882-7777 or call 1-800-FRANNET.

Retirement Living And Care At Bonaventure Senior Living

Temporary Stay Program Bonaventure Senior Living

We offer a Temporary Stay Program designed to introduce you to our amenities and services while you make your long-term care decisions.

There are three ways the Temporary Stay program can work for you:

Recovery Care
This option is perfect if you are recovering from an illness or hospital stay. Our communities offer full time caregivers who are on duty 24 hours a day to assist in your recovery.

Experience the Lifestyle
Our Temporary Stay apartment is the perfect way to experience senior living on a temporary basis. This opportunity will help you make the best decision concerning your future.

Respite Care
Our Respite Care program provides both physical and emotional relief for caregivers. Whether the stay is only overnight, several days or lasts a month, this program allows family members peace of mind while they take time to rest.

Why You Should Experience Temporary Stay
Your furnished apartment has a barrier free shower and a 24-hour security call system. Personal care staff is on duty 24 hours a day to assist you. We also encourage participation in the planned social and recreational programs on site.

Extras Bonaventure Senior Living
For a nominal fee our communities will provide personal care services, medication management, assistance with bathing, specialized nighttime needs and much, much more!

We can customize a service plan that is just right for you!

Memory Care

Dignity, choice and independence are more than just words in our Memory Care communities. They are the basis of our care philosophy.

We believe in family involvement. For family members, we offer monthly support groups and educational series. We understand the fear and sadness you feel as your loved one progresses through the stages of Alzheimer’s. Your regular involvement in service planning is encouraged and will help you fully understand the changing needs of your loved one.

Our communities offer individually tailored programs designed by our qualified staff. You can relax knowing that the one you love is truly being treated with respect and dignity while being encouraged to be as independent as their disease will permit.

Our residents are surrounded with mementos of yesteryear along with their own personal belongings in either a private or semi-private home-like apartment. Our beautiful landscaped grounds allow residents to safely enjoy the outdoors and the changing seasons.

For more information about our Memory Care Program, we invite you to contact one of our Memory Care communities directly to speak with a caring staff member

Retirement Living Bonaventure Senior Living

Enjoy a carefree retirement lifestyle in a comfortable private apartment in our beautifully decorated communities. Mingle with friends, sit and chat by the fireplace, or join in on one of the many planned outings and activities. At a Bonaventure Senior Living Community, you can truly call your time, your own.

We cater to older adults who are independent and active yet want supportive services to make their lives more carefree. We offer large deluxe studio, one-bedroom, and two-bedroom apartments, some with private patios or balconies. Every apartment has a full kitchen along with individual climate controls. Furnish your home with your own furniture and special treasures to truly make it your own.

There are no buy-in fees or long term leases. Instead we offer a simple month-to-month plan that allows great flexibility. Retirement living with Bonaventure Senior Living is the perfect choice!

Adult Children, Aging Parents: When Care giving Roles are Reversed

Her daughters grown, 42-yearold Georgette Smith faced a new challenge caring for her disabled mother. Chronic emphysema sapped what little strength remained in the 68-year-old woman’s frail, wheelchair bound body. The care needs were overwhelming. Georgette began to look for relief by checking out a nearby nursing home. On that fateful day, when she overheard Georgette discuss the nursing home with a friend, the mother responded quickly. Suddenly the conversation was frozen in time by a single bullet that severed Georgettes spine and rendered her paralyzed. Shirley Egan shot her daughter because she feared confinement in a nursing home.  Shirley’s new home became the Orange County Jail. The Smith-Egan story is true. Although the circumstances are extreme, it reflects the dilemma adult children face trying to balance the needs of aging parents with other life demands. A survey by the National Alliance for Care giving (NAC) discovered that more than 22.4 million U.S. households (1 in 4) care for an older relative or friend or have given such care within the past year. The value of family care giving exceeds 200 billion dollars.1 Daughters and daughters-in-law are the primary caregivers for older adults, even though many of these middle-aged caregivers still have children or teenagers at home. Care giving concerns are reaching more and more families. Listen to the water-cooler conversation and you are as likely to hear a co-worker seeking adult daycare options as finding after-school programs.

The percentage of Americans over age 65 has tripled. The fastest growing population group is over age 85. As older adults live longer, increased longevity results in greater likelihood of exhausting assets, outliving a spouse, and losing potential for independent living. The high costs of long-term care prompts many families to provide shelter and care giving in the home. The pressures of this economically driven trend toward family care giving has given Baby Boomers a new title: the Sandwich Generation, caught between the demands of children and aging parents.

For Christian Baby Boomers, parenting their parents is more than an economic necessity; its an expression of faith. If we do not provide for our relatives, and especially for our immediate families, we have denied the faith and are worse than unbelievers (1 Tim. 5:8). Even under the best circumstances, the escalating needs of aging parents and the sacrifices required of adult children present both challenges and blessings.

 

 

 

*Care giving Challenges*

As long as Mother is mentally alert, she wants to stay in her home. Physical problems are the greatest threat to independent living. Approximately five million older adults need help with activities of daily living, such as bathing, food preparation, medication, shopping, and money management.2 Giving direct assistance or hiring a care aide along with regular telephone contact and visits may extend Mothers ability to live independently. Don’t most older adults go to nursing homes for care assistance? NO! Only 4% of persons over age 65 receive long-term care in a nursing home. The majority (67%) live in the community with spouse, children, relatives or in assisted living facilities.

The remaining 32% of older adults live alone.3 My wife and I must work five more years to get full retirement benefits, but my father cant stay alone all day. Depending on the level of care, the older adult may participate in community senior programs, attend adult daycare, or require a care aide. A time limited option available to some individuals is the Family and Medical Leave Act (1993), which allows an employee in a company with 50 or more employees to take up to 12 weeks unpaid leave a year to care for a family member without losing job security. Some companies allow flextime to retain experienced workers.

Our home wasn’t built for care giving. How can we make it safe? Many adaptations are simple and inexpensive. For example, rearrange furnishings to make clear paths within and between rooms. Add handrails in the bathroom and hallways. Replace doorknobs with lever handles. Ask your physician to recommend a home evaluation by an occupational therapist for a wealth of safety and mobility enhancement tips.

My husband doesn’t understand the stress I have dealing with menopause,

teenagers, and an aging parent. Care giving families must share the primary caregivers load, so that she also has time to be a wife, mother, and individual. Intergenerational families are most successful when each person has responsibilities in the care process suitable to his or her skills. A teen can read or offer to write letters for a grandparent while the parents go out. The spouse may bring home deli dinner on the night Mom goes to Bible study. Another relative may be called to stay with the older adult when the parents attend the teenagers soccer game. Primary caregivers need time alone and with others to return refreshed for routine care giving duties. I love my Mom, but I’m overwhelmed as a single parent. How can I care for her?

Providing direct care is not always possible. Distance, the need to work, absence of spousal or sibling support, and lack of patience are all reasons to find other care options. Look for the least restrictive care suitable to the needs. Choosing an assisted living facility, maintaining contact with the staff, frequent visits, or hiring a geriatric case manager keeps adult children involved in the care decisions.

 

 

*Care giving Blessings*

 

Scripture speaks the heart cry of older adults: Do not cast me away when I am old; do not forsake me when my strength is gone(Ps. 71:9). The bond between an adult child and an aging parent was forged from the crib. Today, that adult child functions as a parent to the aging parent. Few are emotionally prepared for these role changes. Counselors and pastors can show caregivers how to find the blessings in these changes for themselves and their families. Accept the role changes as functional rather than intrinsic. The medical, financial, and daily care decisions made by the adult child are for a limited time. A lifetime of being Daddys girl or Moms beloved son transcends present infirmities. Picture dependence as an extension of trust. An aging adult often feels powerless in so many ways. Looking to the adult child for guidance, the love and trust between parent and child comes full circle. Be honest with the entire family about care giving responsibilities. Becoming a care giving home affects the whole family, not just the primary caregiver and care receiver.

The most successful care giving families periodically shift the duties regularly spend time away from care giving, maintain outside interests, and find ways to include the care receiver in normal family activities. Balance demands with delights. So much care giving interaction is repetitious. Find ways to share time for treats with the care receiver. Pack a picnic lunch for the patio. Watch old movies together. Read aloud the comics or a humorous book. Seek emotional support. Care giving with no end in sight can be physically and emotionally exhausting.

The primary caregiver who sees this role as a ministry may feel too guilty to express the frustration and anger that is being suppressed in the line of duty. Find an appropriate support group where the caregiver has a safe place to verbalize concerns. The primary caregiver may also need individual counseling to deal with any past conflicts or resentments toward the care receiver. Share spiritual connections. As the older adult gains strength from spiritual expressions, so the entire family grows from shared faith.

Move the family altar to the care room. Invite the pastor and Christian friends to visit for evening prayer. Sing old hymns. Reminisce about faith-affirming events such as dedication of children, baptisms, and marriages. Plan a time after breakfast or before dinner when the entire family gathers to pray for one another. Choose whether to be caught in the middle or active within the center. Thinking of yourself as a sandwiched care giver reinforces a trapped image. In reality, the primary caregiver is like an air traffic controller, the center of all activities, directing services that sustain the care receiver. Caregiving in the Community of Believers Care giving is an intense experience. Caregiver and care receiver have to be free to express their deepest concerns to a willing listener pastor, counselor, friend, or relative. Communication within the care giving family and with an encouraging church spreads an understanding of how adult children and aging parents find fulfillment and spiritual growth in their final years together. Christian Counselor is always available to help you out.

*Epilogue*

Georgette Smith won court approval to remove life support. Shirley Egan was at her daughters side. Reports say that with dying breaths, the daughter and mother shared forgiveness. Mrs. Egan was acquitted on August 18, 1999, of attempting to kill her daughter. Her lawyer said that Mrs. Egan was involuntarily intoxicated from prescription drugs and didnt intend to shoot her daughter. Take help from telephone counseling.

Aging, Elder Care, and Senior Retirement Centers

There was a time, not that long ago, when a senior citizen could plan on living with an adult child as the years took their relentless toll. Now senior retirement centers are popping up seemingly everywhere.

It’s a good idea to take a look at why these changes are taking place and how each of us can best fit into this new pattern of elder care.

The most glaring difference today is the prevalence of working women. Even a few decades ago, a full-time homemaker often had the time and energy to care for an aging parent in her own residence. Many homes boasted a “mother-in-law” apartment in the basement, over the garage of somewhere else on the premises. In many economic, social and religious groups it was a matter of pride to “care for one’s own”. In addition, there were few really appealing options beyond that ethic.

The reason there are so many senior retirement centers today is not just the lack of wives at home to take on the responsibility of geriatric care, there is also a preference surfacing in the seniors themselves. No matter how welcoming the environment is, a private home usually doesn’t offer the stimulation and peer relationships that the new senior retirement centers are providing. Many seniors frankly want to choose their own support-oriented residence.

If incomes are high enough, savings are adequate or HUD and Medicaid benefits are available, it can be a win/win situation. Full calendars and new friendships can replace the isolation that living in another person’s home can produce. Even the most loving adult child is usually busy with the demands of a full life of his/her own. What can ensue is mutual independence.

Not all senior retirement centers are supportive. Careful investigation needs to be done to find a match. However, the rewards that come from putting some serious time and effort into the search can be great.

As this cultural change develops, a surprising factor is surfacing. At one time, the dread of making such arrangements kept seniors from moving on until it was absolutely necessary. What we are starting to observe is a trend involving seniors moving into these new facilities earlier out of choice. Enthusiasm is replacing fear and years of active, support-oriented living can be the unexpected bonus.

Those who doubt the wisdom of selling their homes and moving into a senior retirement center are visiting friends who have made just such a choice. They often find that the pros outweigh the cons. As the new centers appear, competition is emerging and the units, amenities and perks become increasingly attractive. It’s getting to be a “don’t knock it if you haven’t tried it” situation with positive results.

Old Colony Elder Services Urges Baby Boomers To Learn More About Long Term Care Planning Now

 BROCKTON, MA.

Old Colont Elder Services (OCES), a non-profit Aging Services Access Point (ASAP) located in Brockton, is supporting the Executive Office of Elder Affairs’ (EOEA) campaign “Embrace Your Future” to raise awareness about the importance of long term care planning.

 

Anyone between 45 and 60 years old who is interested in more information about planning for retirement and long term care should contact OCES at (508) 584-1561 to request a brochure.

 

The “Embrace Your Future” campaign is targeting the people born between 1946 and 1964 and encouraging them to take steps now to plan for their future needs. According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ National Clearinghouse for Long Term Care Information, planning for future long term care needs is important for a number of reasons:

 

Expense – Long term care services are often much more expensive than people think. Care often exceeds what the average person can pay using their income and other resources. You may not meet the eligibility requirements for federal or state assistance. Medicare, disability insurance and health insurance do not pay for long term care services.

 

Financial and emotional stress – The financial and emotional burden of your care will rest solely on your family members unless you plan ahead. Remember, your assets may not be enough to cover the costs of your care.

 

More care choices – By planning ahead, you will have more choices as to how your long term support needs will be met as well as where you wish to receive that care – for many, the desire is to remain at home for as long as possible.

 

“When you are healthy and active, there is often no sense of urgency with regard to planning for long term care because the potential needs seem so far into the future. But, planning ahead is the best way to ensure that your future needs will be met and that you will have the resources to pay for those needs. Long term care costs are rising and the government will not have the funds to support them. We strongly encourage anyone between 45 and 60 to contact us for more information,” explained Diana DiGiorgi, Executive Director of OCES.

 

The best way to begin planning is by taking the first step to obtain more information. Contact OCES at (508) 584-1561 to request that an “Embrace Your Future” brochure be mailed to you at no charge. Or, 800ageinfo.com or www.longtermcare.gov/campaign/ma for more information.

 

About OCES
Incorporated in 1974, Old Colony Elder Services is one of 27 private, non-profit Aging Services Access Points (ASAPs) in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. 

OCES offers a number of programs to serve seniors, individuals with disabilities, their families and caregivers such as Family Caregiver; Adult Family Care; Supportive Housing; Nutrition; Money Management; Protective Services; Home Care and more.

 

OCES offers these programs in the towns of Abington, Avon, Bridgewater, Brockton, Carver, Duxbury, East Bridgewater, Easton, Halifax, Hanover, Hanson, Kingston, Lakeville, Marshfield, Middleboro, Pembroke, Plymouth, Plympton, Rockland, Stoughton, Wareham, West Bridgewater and Whitman. 

The organization’s mission is to provide services that support the dignity and independence of elders by helping them maximize their quality of life; live safely and in good health; and, prevent
unnecessary or premature institutionalization. 

In 2009, OCES was honored with the Metro-South Chamber of Commerce’s “Economic Impact Award”. The agency has 140 employees.  For more information call (508) 584-1561 or visit the website at www.oldcolonyelderservices.org.

Insurance: Bridging The Long-Term Care Gap

Providing for adequate health care is one of the top concerns for today’s seniors. And yet, many find themselves coming up short when that need is for long term care. With costs skyrocketing and government purse strings tightening, planning for such care has never been more important. Don’t let long term care costs take you by surprise.

The gap that exists between what seniors need in long term care and what Medicare and Medicaid will cover is huge. Combine that with the proposed Congressional bill restricting Medicaid nursing home coverage, and it’s clear to see that seniors and those nearing retirement simply can’t afford to ignore this important issue.

How you approach your long term care needs, which include custodial and skilled nursing in-home care, assisted living facilities and nursing home care, depends greatly on your economic situation. For those with low incomes and little assets, there are few choices. Most likely, should the need for long term care arise, you’ll quickly spend down your assets and easily qualify for Medicaid.

For those with an annual incomes exceeding $75,000 and with assets of $500,000 or more, you could simply pay for it out of pocket. But with nursing homes costing thousands of dollars a month and some seniors needing years of such care, even a well-lined nest egg could experience a drastic drop in value. A more prudent approach would be to purchase long term care insurance and use that to pay for any long term care you or your spouse may need.

The real conundrum exists for those seniors of moderate means, those with incomes between $30,000 and $50,000 who have a few hundred thousand dollars in assets. Long term care needs could gut your life savings and impoverish the healthy spouse. But long term care insurance can be very expensive and hard for these seniors to afford.

Long term care insurance is complicated and there are many issues you must understand when considering it. My next article will be devoted purely to better understanding long term care insurance and what to look for when buying it.

If purchasing long term care insurance isn’t an option for you, there are still some strategies you can use to cover that care should you need it. Selling your life insurance policies, called a life settlement, is one option. Reverse mortgages can also free up needed cash. Selling your home, however unpleasant that may be, can also provided needed funds. But in all of these strategies it is better to leverage those proceeds by using them to buy long term care insurance, if possible.

But for now, let’s consider some issues that none of us like to think about, but will greatly influence how we each address our long term care needs. When someone is no longer able to care for themselves, usually the healthy spouse, if there is one, will take over the care. Few seniors, wealthy or not, are quick to dip into their savings to hire nurses or other care givers to help out.

The result is that the healthy spouse often sacrifices their own health and well-being to care for the sick one. We’ve all seen it happen, how the ‘healthy’ spouse becomes exhausted and emotionally spent trying to meet the overwhelming needs of the other.

If they’re lucky, their adult children will step in to help shoulder the burden. Some families have gone on like this for years, with sons and daughters spoon feeding their parents and changing their diapers. The emotional toll on the family in these situations is indescribable.

How much easier life is when seniors take active steps to provide for this care properly. Then the family can spend their emotional and physical strength on cherishing their loved one, without ruining their own lives in the process.

No one can predict with certainty how their end-of-life will go. But the fact remains that nearly half of all seniors will need nursing home care. Those who don’t are likely to need some kind of outside help. Plan now for how you’re going to provide for your long term care. Your health, and the health of your loved ones, depends on it.

When You Promise To Care For A Parent

When You Promise To Care For A Parent, one Daughter’s Story

This is my story to be shared in the hope that other families will have the opportunity to plan properly in advance for a loved one’s Long Term Care needs. My mother was uninsurable years before I got into this industry as a Long Term Care Insurance Specialist, unfortunately. She gave of herself to keep my grandmother home during her final months of life I the mid 1960’s when she needed intense care – fulfilling that age-old promise of not putting a loved one in a nursing home; and, so, I made the same commitment to my own mother 40 years later.

My mother’s health history was shaky, and years before she passed we built a mother-in-law apartment onto our home. It was a perfect picture of a well-balanced family; we all got along well, especially since Mom had her own exterior entrance to come and go as she pleased with a second door to shut us off from the main house when she’d had enough of our girls! I am so grateful to have had my mother living with us during her last 4 years of life. My mother’s assets that remained at the time of her care need was but a small emergency fund to cover final expenses, funeral luncheon, etc. My husband and I were paying for college for 2 of our 3 daughters at the time. So, we were definitely buried within the sandwich generation.

How Mom’s Care Needs Played Out

I’m first going to share with you how I had WISHED my mother’s care experience had played out, then how it really played out . . . . Each morning I’d have my coffee with her nurse reviewing how her night went and greeting my mother with a loving hug in the morning, spending quality time with her watching her favorite movies, serving her lunch, and reviewing all the family pictures; then taking a break while her nurse helped her with a bath, all changing and lifting. I would, however, do her hair, and then we would continue reviewing memories and family stories and greeting visitors that came to say their final farewells.

The reality was that I had taken an unpaid leave of absence from my employer 6 months before her passing and lived off of savings, forfeited employer contributions to my 401(k), and while the last few weeks of my mother’s care needs intensified, I caught myself in a position where I had to do lifting which created a few compressed discs in my back. Hopsice would have paid for my mother to be in a facility and only a little help at home, but not the kind of help she needed daily, which I where I came in.

We’d already decided to keep her out of a facility and keep her home like she had done for my grandmother. It was my promise. The last week or so I wasn’t aware that I subconsciously didn’t want to leave her side even when I had to go to the bathroom. I didn’t realize that I wasn’t eliminating fully and unknowingly was cramping and I couldn’t eliminate creating a substantial back-up in my system and narrowly missed severe kidney damage, according to what showed up in testing within the year after my mom’s death. My husband and I had to lift my mother off the floor up onto the hospital bed (higher than regular bed) one night after she had decided she was undressing and leaving to go on a trip, which stressed his already bad back and further aggravating my compression problem.

I was the one who had to administer the anti-anxiety drugs so she would start to relax to the point where she wouldn’t keep trying to get out of bed, then upping dosage to keep her comfortable. To be totally honest, I am a very strong woman, but doing that to my own mother was psychologically distressing to me, seriously. In the end she slipped into coma while I played her favorite movies and music. I read the Hospice book weeks before hand and subconsciously knew what was happening, but was so traumatized that I didn’t want to admit that my mother was slipping away before my own eyes. I thought we had more time.

Impact On My Health, Income and Assets

While a loved one’s passing is traumatic for anyone, I hope you’ll take this story the way it was intended, which is to share with you the true burden, from a daughter’s perspective — what it really means – REAL WORLD – when the daughter makes the commitment to a parent that they won’t ever put Mom or Dad into a nursing home.

There is financial software that analyzes the future value of the income loss I realized, the 401(k) contributions I didn’t make, the employer matching 401(k) contributions that didn’t happen, the loss of income after my Mom’s passing that occurred because I just couldn’t function for a full 6 months, and then ramping up my commission only career back up also took time. The future value to my commitment to my mother came to me at a cost of $302,987 which represents those financial ramifications calculated forward at an average rate of return of 8% from age 44 to age 66 years. If we ever meet, I do carry a copy of that software calculation with me if you’d like to see it. The financial loss to my and my husband’s retirement years of $302,987 plus my compressed disk and kidney/bladder malfunction episode and the psychological trauma are my scars of having cared for my mother, whom I loved so very much.

I Would Have Chosen Differently

I didn’t have choices though because her lack of assets, no long term care insurance and my not having disposable income or assets to pay for her care. If faced with the same circumstances today, now knowing what I do, I probably would have said ‘yes’ to the Hospice facility my mother urged me to consider, even though it would have meant commuting to see my mother those last several weeks and not fulfilling that promise. So I am sharing this story to help some of my readers take their blinders off, literally. You see, I still meet many retirees who use the excuse that one of their adult children will take care of them when they need care, for the reason why they should not look at transferring part or all of the risk of long term care expenses.

Our Responsibility To Provide For Ourselves

I believe, passionately, that we all have a responsibility to provide for our future care needs.  If we don’t plan to transfer some of the risk using long term care insurance, then we must self-insurance and pay for own care costs, even if that means using up the money we intended to pass down to our family.  We all deserve to live with dignity, independently through our last days and not be a burden on our loved onces.

I believe that if we have been blessed financially that we consider including covering extended family members with long term care insurance plans as a loving gift . No one person would ever knowingly subject themselves to the physical, emotional and financial burdens of caring for another — if they had, beforehand, — choices to do otherwise or supplement the loving care that only they as family members could provide. Not until they see the dozens upon dozens of families go on claim needing to activate their long term care policies like I have (which families I am honored to have assisted), no one truly understands what it means to physically care for a loved one unless they’ve done just that.

Many of my clients have cared for their spouses and that seems more natural, but still there is a burden there as well, for which long term care services can be provided by those trained to lift properly, trained to assist in the home with bathing, dressing, feeding, toileting, transferring and continence issues, are there to provide support services such as laundry, housekeeping, food preparation, errands, etc.

More importantly is the possibility of running so low on assets after paying for long term care for one spouse, that the surviving spouse is left in a financial hardship!

Fast forward a few years later and my passion in assisting others as a Long Term Care Insurance Planning Specialist is much more fulfilling than it was prior to my having had the experience of caring for my mother. Every day I help protect loved ones and feel I am blessed to help families this way.

Six Answers about You and Long Term Care

Long term care of elderly is everyone’s concern since it will most likely affect you or a loved one. In this article I’ll respond to 6 questions that encompass your long term care (LTC) concerns: What is LTC? Who needs it? Who provides help for it? What’s the cost? Who pays for it? What should you do about LTC?

What is LTC?

You need LTC when you need help carrying out your activities of daily living (ADLs) for the foreseeable future. For seniors, this most likely means for the rest of their lives. Examples of ADLs are dressing, bathing, toileting, eating, transferring from bed to bathroom and continence.

Who needs LTC?

Boston College’s Center for Retirement Research (BCCRR) (http://crr.bc.edu/images/stories/Briefs/20&ib;_7-13.pdf.) found that three of every four 65 year olds are projected to need LTC in their future. The percent breakdown of elderly needing LTC will be:

31% – no care

29% – 2 years or less

20% – 2 to 5 years

20% – 5 years or more

Who provides help for LTC?

Long term caregivers do. They’re either skilled or custodial caregivers. Custodial caregivers are typically family or friends, volunteers, or paid helpers. Heath care plans pay for skilled caregivers (i.e. medical specialists like doctors, nurses, etc.) but only for custodial services if these are given as part of a skilled care procedure.

You receive LTC in your home, at an adult day center, an assisted living facility, a hospice facility or at a nursing home.

What’s the cost of LTC?

The cost for LTC services depends on where you’re living and what level of long term care you’re getting. Approximate annual costs may be $25,000 for home care at home; $40,000 for an assisted living base rate; and $80,000 or more for nursing home costs. These costs can cut deeply into your savings or legacy.

Who pays for LTC costs?

The BCCRR study shows that 18% of dollars spent on LTC come from direct out-of-pocket payments by individuals. Medicaid pays about 50% of LTC costs but only for those who have almost no assets since Medicaid is for the poor. Medicare paid 20% probably as transition costs only since Medicare is not intended to pay continual LTC costs. Only 7% of LTC dollars were paid for by private LTC insurance policies.

What should you do about LTC?

Clearly, you or a loved one will probably need some long term care in the last stages of life. And it’s very costly. It can wipe out all your savings or legacy if you require a year or more of it. So you need to plan for how you can handle paying your LTC costs.

Three options for paying for LTC are:

1. Pay it out of your pocket (i.e. your own savings)

2. Buy LTC insurance so the insurance can pay it

3. Let Medicare pay it.

Paying for LTC yourself requires having a lot of money – enough earnings on your money to not jeopardize losing all your savings and legacy. Perhaps you should have at least $750,000 not including your home.

If you buy LTC insurance, you’ll have to pay premiums each year. This is more costly the older you are when you start paying them. You get tax breaks for premiums paid. But starting earlier makes premiums less.

Medicaid will pay a person’s LTC costs but only if they’re unable to contribute their own money or assets to what Medicaid pays for you. Only until you have less than about $3,000, will Medicare pay for you at no cost to you. But you can’t just transfer all your assets to loved ones one day and apply for Medicaid the next. You must transfer your assets away some 5 years earlier than when you apply.

So you can see that you need to look into what is the best strategy for you. Depending on your age and wealth you can find a strategy that minimizes your loss of wealth for dealing with the probability of needing LTC.

If you plan early and transfer assets away early, you can possibly save a fortune for you beneficiaries.

Next Page »